#345

just thought I should just come up here before heading of to bed..

haven't been doing much lately to be quite honest.. which is why lotsa things have been running through my mind lately.

it's only three more weeks before o levels. i'm trying to work really hard now, but I really don't have any confidence. it isn't the lack of encouragements from people around me.. I have countless of them. it's the stress I'm putting on myself. and I don't even know why I'm putting this much stress on myself. it's not like, my parents are expecting a lot from me. I.. I really don't know.

these days, I really want nothing but to spend a whole full day with little baby girl. but even spending time with her makes me think a lot.

she's 21months old currently. I'm afraid of her growing up, I'm not even gonna lie to you. she's so precious to me that I'm so afraid of her growing up, and starts being independent, and leaves me. I don't want that. I.. it's not about me being attached to people easily. it's the fact that she is this precious to me and I don't think I can live without her.

with that being said, me being attached to people easily. I.. I still can't forget things that have happened last year. time has flew past so fast that I can't breathe. things that had happened last year are still being replayed in my mind vividly like they just happened. and they are the kind of awesome memories that I wanna forget or else I can never move on.

this, makes me wonder about another thing. why does these kinda stuffs exist in our lives? why can't we just move on after everything that has happened? or does this happens to me, and just only me.. because to be honest, I'm tired of being attached to someone, then them leaving me. everytime this happens, it doesn't make me learn, y'know? I'll still spread my arms wide and let everyone in without any hesitation. why am I like this?

this is just a random post, just random thoughts that have been running through my mind.

bye. :)